Live, Learn, Laugh Until You Cry

For the past two weeks I have been living with my host family in a small village about an hour outside of Bamako. My host family is made up of: Bwa (Grandfather) Ya (Grandmother) Bwatoma (Aunt) Amadou (Father) Marium (Mother) Ladjj (5yr old bother) Mama (baby sister) and Fatim, Detu, Solomon, and Bwa (Nieces and Nephews) and me Marium Diarra-actually they named me something different to start with, but I kept forgetting so they changed it to something easier. The past two weeks I have tried to live like a Malian, which is way easier said than done! My daily routine consisted of first waking up at the crack of dawn to donkeys, goats, and roosters chattering. Then I give my bucket to my host mother and she would fill it and carry it into the Negen. I then try to bathe-try being the key word here, it is hard to say how clean I am actually getting while standing over a hole in the ground used for the bathroom, all the while being surrounded by walls made of mud bricks, packed together with more mud. After getting dressed and slathering my self with sunscreen and bug repellant I am given my breakfast of bread (and fried eggs on one wonderful occasion) and a sweet coffee-ish drink. Upon finishing my breakfast I have to insisted to my mother that I am full ( n’fala, n’fala tuw tuw) and thank the Lord for my food (A Barika, a Barika Allah Amiina). I then have to greet every member of my family who is older than me, starting with the oldest. By this time my host mother thinks I am going to be late for language class and insists that I leave, even though I still have about an hour-which is strange considering we are now on “Mali time.” Mali time means no one is in a hurry to do anything, or go anywhere, partially because of the heat, but mostly because in Mali you greet everyone you pass along the way to where you are going, by saying “Good Morning, How did you sleep? How are you? How is your family? How is your mother? How is your father? How are your children? Where are you going? May God grant you with a peaceful day." And then each person asks you all of these same questions. So I start my walk down the road to the school, which in America would have taken me 3-5 minutes, however in Mali I’m a toubob (white person) and everyone wants to talk to the toubob, so I make it to the school if I’m lucky in 25 minutes! We have Bambara lessons for four hours then make the journey back to our houses for lunch- which usually consists of rice with sauce. The afternoons in Mali are pretty relaxed and easy unless it is a laundry day. If it is nice outside and it is not a laundry day everyone in my concession takes a nap on mats in the shade and prays for a breeze. I then head back to class and try to learn more Bambara. When this session is over, my evenings are always full of surprises- sometimes I walk around the village and attempt to talk to my neighbors, sometimes I have tea, play with kids, ride my bike, help cook dinner, or just study. My family eats pretty late usually 8:00 by lamp light- which is nice, especially on nights when we have fish (Jeka)- that way I can’t see it’s face staring back at me! Then I enjoy the cool open air while listening to the radio, sipping tea, or trying unsuccessfully to talk to my family before heading to bed and starting all over the next day.

There is no way to really describe to you what I have experienced over the past two weeks-amazingly the two weeks went really fast, but at the same time I feel like I’ve been here for months! Throughout the past two weeks there were times when it was rough, times when it was easy, times that were funny, and times that were down right hilarious-but through it all I learned so incredibly much!
For starters I have learned how say more than just good morning, how is your family, in Bambara. I have learned how to successfully eat just about anything with my hands without making a complete mess. I have learned how to wash, shampoo, and condition my hair all with ONE bucket of water. I have learned in order to avoid creepy crawling creatures it is best to avoid the Negen all together between the hours of 8pm-5am ! I have learned that no matter how hard it is raining, no matter how hard the wind is blowing, no matter how scary the storm, my tin roof will in fact stay intact (thus far!). I have learned that Malian’s are not that great at charades-but have no problem laughing their heads off when I’m attempting to act out what I’m trying to say.
I have learned that Malian children LOVE attention! In Mali, or at least in my village children of all ages are given a ton of responsibility -responsibility to do their chores, as well as look after each other. It is very common to see a 6 or 7 year old girl with her baby sister or brother tied to her back. The children love when anyone pays attention to them-especially a new toubob! However there are the few that are absolutely terrified of me, and for the first time, ever in my life I actually have had little toddlers run away crying after seeing me. The children love anything you do with them, toss a ball, play soccer, throw a Frisbee, or my personal favorite say-the-name-of-what-I’m-pointing-at-game. A new experience for me is walking down the street and hearing Marium, Marium, Mum, Mumoo, and other various forms of my name being shouted from every street corner, tree, window, and any other place children hide- I usually try to at least wave in every direction I hear it coming from..but pretty soon before I know it I’m surrounded my 25 children all reaching out dirty little hands for me to shake or high five. One night there were a bunch of children running around my concession so I blew up a beach ball and tossed around with them and they LOVED it! They played and played for hours with a simple beach ball from the dollar store! It was amazing!
Most of all I have learned that laughter is a universal language- Thank the Lord! We all know I’m good at laughing! One of the best ways to practice language, and pick up on new words is to just wonder around the village and see what everyone is up to. ( this is called Yala Yala) In Mali you don’t have to be asked to come into any family’s concession- you are always welcome! Some people just do the general greetings, ask you about your family, where you are going, what you are doing, but then there are the tricksters who throw something new and different in there. I try to say that I don’t understand, and to that most just say it slower, and louder as if some how magically that will make me understand. When all else fails I shrug my shoulders, and laugh- in Mali this is totally acceptable! They love it! I actually think some people try to say something I wont understand just so they can laugh at me. Sometimes even when I do know what they are saying and I respond correctly they still laugh just to laugh. Some days laughter is the only way I can get by- this is especially true the one night after I experienced my first Malian tea. Let me tell you- this ain’t your Grandma’s tea (not mine at least!)!! They serve you tea in a shot glass and this stuff is 100 proof! It is strong and sweet and the second you swallow it your heart beats faster! Unknowing all of this, I agreed to tea with my host mother at 9:30 at night… So there I am laying in my bug hut, fanning myself just thinking. Not thinking about anything in particular but something that I can’t remember now struck me to be so funny and I started laughing- hysterically laughing- pretty soon I’m just laughing at myself for laying in my bed all alone laughing-I laughed until I cried.

At my village there are six other education volunteers with me and as weird as this may sound I feel like I have known these people all of my life! I can’t remember a time when I didn’t know them! We have all really depended on each other the past two weeks depended on each other for a good laugh, a shoulder to cry on and an ear to vent to and I know that our friendship will only get stronger from now until swear-in on September 3rd.